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This is a reflection in response to watching the movie, Amazing Grace,

which is the extraordinary story of Willam Wilberforce’s journey to stop the slave trade in Britan.

Oh God, what is greatness really?

Is it just to be known for large, sweeping change?

Is it dependent on the number of lives touched?

Is it something that can even be recognized on the earth?

Oh Father, you have called many men to do extraordinary things here on earth.

Yet many still refuse to behold the reality of human suffering and sin.

I myself know of this ignorance.

I live within it every single day.

I have had flashes of passion based on moments of clarity.

I’ve allowed myself to be broken but just a handful of times.

And when I take an honest account of my heart,

I see that it is far from the things that move your heart.

Some days I wonder if I am much different than those who are blind.

I have much in common with them.

And still I call myself a Christian.

Many who have come before me,

That great cloud of witnesses,

Would look at my life and wonder why I waste so much time.

They would see my diluted dreams and weep.

From their vantage point I must look like a sloth… a glutton.

But alas they then would be inclined to see the Holy Spirit inside of me.

And though my days are certainly numbered, they must hold out hope.

That the same power that took hold of them,

through the belief in the resurrection of Jesus Christ,

will seize my feeble mind and strike down my foolish pride.

That the same God that worked in them to produce fruit worthy of repentance,

Will finish the work He began in me some six years ago.

And I too believe in Him…

When I know not to believe in myself. 

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